1.        Their home is pristine

I have had ONE client in over 15 years in business who kept a pristine home and was also an ideal client. When I walk into a new client’s home, ready to evaluate their big design problem, only to find a beautiful well-kept house, I become very uneasy. What I have found, largely through consulting work, is that these clients are…impossible to please. Not because they are difficult people, but because they seem to be wired to never feel good enough. They have a beautiful home that is coordinated, clean, and not problematic in any way that is smacking me in the eyeballs, and yet, they are unhappy, convinced that they can do better. I’m sure this stems from mommy or daddy issues, but that is none of my business.

The problem is they want to pay me to validate their insecurities, and what usually happens is that once I look at things more critically, I do find flaws. And they are seldom easy or inexpensive to fix. Which is seldom the answer the client wants to hear. And so they move on, having paid me for my time, and drawn nothing from it but more self-doubt. So if you’ve been on the fence about calling a designer but hesitate because you are ashamed of your space being a mess, take comfort in knowing that you are more likely to be an ideal client, especially if you have no time to address the very mess that is driving you crazy. I have the team in place to navigate normal household messes (within reason of course, we don’t work with hoarders) and get you set up with a space that is designed to meet your lifestyle requirements, reduce the mess, reduce the clutter, and maybe even start hosting holiday dinners again.

2.        They know what they want

I’ve received some very odd inquiries over the years from people who claim they are easy to work with because they “know what they want”, and I am still shaking my head. Why exactly are they calling if they have oodles of super specific ideas about what they want? I have no idea, but I’ve given several of these clients a fair shake, and it never results in anything tangible. And that’s not how I roll. The more specific a client is about design features they want to implement, the less likely they will be a good fit to work with me. Next…

3.        They need a designer to “pull it all together”

It’s striking how a description like this, which is literally what I do in the final phases of a project, seems to be directly tied to certain types of inquiries. Historically, I have observed that when a prospect uses this specific language, they are usually knee-deep in a project already. Not always, but often.

Example:

I received a call from a lady who was eager to work with me, overwhelmed by the rush of the construction process, and needed backup. Since she agreed to my fee, I saw no good reason to stonewall her (at the time). I arrived at her home to find construction underway, her master bathroom partitioned off with plastic, and her bathroom fully demolished. She wasn’t asking me to help her develop a plan that would be carefully executed. She was asking me to save her after she’d wandered into the deep end. She needed decisions made, FAST. While I did what I could for her within the agreed flat rate, this was not a scenario that would allow anything close to premium level results. This was a lipstick-on-a-pig scenario that I am seeing replayed way too often for my liking.

The client goes with the lowest bid, or “the guy in the middle” who (much like the least expensive contractor) comes in and demolishes the space without requiring any plans or specifications. Then what? Then panic sets in when the client realizes they don’t have a bathroom, or a kitchen, or both. They rush to call in whomever can help them the fastest, but the fees they pay don’t lead to an ideal design, they lead to a quick fix, or lipstick on a pig. I believe that when a client is investing tens of thousands of dollars in their home, they should do it right, or not at all. I no longer offer consulting to clients who are post-demo.

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I suffer from a need to help everyone, to say “Yes”. I’m a people-pleaser. And like many people-pleasers, I have been conditioned over decades to understand that while my intentions are good, I cannot help everyone, nor should I try to. I need to focus my energy on where it is most appreciated, valued, and yes, lucrative, for the sake of my own well-being of course, but also that of the family that I provide for.

If you’re a busy professional residing in the Tri Valley area, have a home that is embarrassing to you, or just doesn’t fulfill your needs, and you have no idea how to go about fixing the problem, send me an inquiry. I am a problem solver by nature and by trade, and will be happy to help you find the right path.

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